Wikileaks

the funniest joke i have heard in a long time
made me chuckle on the tube:
comic on wikileaks: hillary clinton saying - embarrassed about leaks? me? Mrs Bill Clinton?

cheers

sland Living ütleb:
have you been drinking?
dare ütleb:
nope
why
Island Living ütleb:
you sound far too cheerful
dare ütleb:
i am cheerful!
Island Living ütleb:
i can tell

the zoo

Joe ütleb:
i thought you were going to museums
spark plug ütleb:
i changed my mind
i am going to yoga soon
besides, nobody in the house, how can i not stay in and enjoy it?
Joe ütleb:
it's a shithole
spark plug ütleb:
i know
roaches, mice and a rat
Joe ütleb:
that's a bit harsh.. you're a bit irritating, but not a rat as such

how you define it

P: Stop being so weird!
A: I'm not weird, I am quirky.
P: Ha, you might as well go for eccentric.

quote from an old movie

"I have observed you for seven days, and came to the conclusion that you deserve me"

jobs

sis: I want you to help me write a motivational letter for the new job offer I found. check your email.
moi: hey! it says "works well with people" in the requirements. you should just quit that thought.
sis in email: take a look, and it better be a good look. and quit with those shady jokes!!!!!!

Tracy failed

Joel: Yeah, I can't believe freelancers undermine each other like that. We should have a revolution!
Moi: Yeah, like Tracy Chapman.
Joel: She only talked about it, never really got to do any of it.
Steve: Well, at least she had a fast car.

põrsikud

teenage tough says:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1309752/Joanne-Kitchen-killed-lover-shouting-mans-sex.html
Inga says:
let it be warning to us all!
teenage tough says:
mhm!

Ayomide Cracker has been added to the conversation.

teenage tough says:
prunn!
Inga ütles selle kohta: let it be warning to us all!
Inga says:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/09/07/article-1309752-0B1171C5000005DC-954_233x315.jpg
ee ...
teenage tough says:
ja siis suurem eee http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/09/07/article-1309752-0B11A632000005DC-418_233x458.jpg
Inga says:
noh, minu eee on siiski suurem
kuigi matchivad
teenage tough says:
matchivad jah
Inga says:
niiet meil siiski pole siit suurt õppida
teenage tough says:
selliste seakasvatajate nägudega mõlemad
Inga says:
sest pole suurt tõenäosust et mõni meist oleks sellise djuudiga
teenage tough says:
jah, ega pole väga tõesti
Ayomide Cracker says:
mhmh, fänn ja tema mees kah korralikud põrsatalunikud (2 tatti)
Inga says:
siis fänn olgu küll ettevaatlik!!!
karjugem mis tahame, naised!
Ayomide Cracker says:
jajah, täna rääkis, kuidas läks mehega tülli
Inga says:
oi, kui kurb :( räägi meile ka :(
Ayomide Cracker says:
oojaa, meeleldi. fänn juhendas telefonitsi meest, kuhu sõitma peaks, et nad kokku saaks. ja siis mees ütles, et ma olen siin ehituspoe ääres ja siis tuli välja, et tegu oli ehituspoodide tänavaga. ja siis oli kõik halvasti. palju sitta ja verd
siiani ei räägi
mees oli üle kuu aja komandeeringus ja naisel on natuke kehva meel, et ta tagasi on. harjus üksiolemisega päris ära
nüüd tüli kui palju teisest (mehest)
enne sai igast foorumistes öö otsa mängida ja väljas käia ja keegi ei lugenud moraali
nüüd: miks sa nii hilja voodisse tuled?
Inga says:
*hõõ
Ayomide Cracker says:
mis sa seal arvuti taga teed
Inga says:
*hõõ
Ayomide Cracker says:
ja siis töö juures ei lähe ka hästi. töö on ripakil. isegi minul on talle etteheited
minul, kes ma nii leebe ja viisakas olen
sigadusi kui palju tehtud, ühesõnaga
Inga says:
fännil on lavvä?
mõtted hajevil?
teenage tough says:
hoorab ringi?
või maksab ise peale?
Inga says:
ja nüüd raha otsas ja meel mõru?
teenage tough says:
jah, ja mehe käest ei saa küsida, sest ei saa seletada
Ayomide Cracker says:
armukest ma kahtlustasin, aga vist ikka mitte. pigem selline foorumites külgelöömine
ja siis saavad foorumirahvaga kokku ja joovad-lakuvad
teenage tough says:
haiged on või?
Ayomide Cracker says:
ou-ou, aga üks ütles foorumis: a kuule, ega sa põrsik ei ole? milline sa välja näed? põrsikutega ma ei räägi
fänn: a wtf see põrsik veel on?!
ma pugistasin omaette pihku naerda
Inga says:
põrsik LOL

morning conversation

sis: baby, I said: "no!". and why are we still arguing about this?
niece: well, you keep saying no to me.

vampiirikad

cookie says:
muti!
kõva sari
Lie To Me
INGEL says:
no ma vaatan praegu vampire diaries ja teeb meele väga rõõmsaks!
cookie says:
teeb?
on hea?
INGEL says:
no ma ütleks pigem, et meelelahutuslik
cookie says:
minu lemmik on Supernatural
selline naiivne ja huvitav
INGEL says:
no selle vampire diaries kohta võib sama öelda
cookie says:
aga lie to me
tim roth!
raisk, ma hakkasin vanamehi fännama
INGEL says:
nojah, ma pole ammu vaadanud sarju, nüüd vaatan selle esimese hooaja ära, siis vaatan vist true bloodi, siis on mul kõik vampiirisarjad vaadatud. kuigi sel true bloodil on väga pikad osad
cookie says:
true bloodi puhul tuleb teist hooaega vaadata
see rootsi poiss on päris äge
INGEL says:
saab siis aru ka midagi kui esimest ei vaata?
cookie says:
aga see sookie on nii välimuselt kui ka häälelt okset tekitav
INGEL says:
mh, ma just mäletan, et pianos ta mulle meeldis väga
cookie says:
ja see tema love interest on kole ja vana
pianos jah
aga nüüd
nii et ma vaatan kolmandat hooaega rootsi poisi pärast
INGEL says:
no siis vaata seda teist vampiirikat, seal on kõik väga noored
ja lihastes
cookie says:
!getya
INGEL says:
sisu on sama, mis tvailaidil + veri ja seks
+ nõid
cookie says:
tvailaiti naersid?
INGEL says:
ma esimese filmi ajal jäin magama, peaks üle vaatama. ma mäletan, et kui ma silmad lahti tegin, siis oli selline vampiirijooksustseen, et ma arvasin, et ma olen mingi paroodia tõmmanud
new moon mulle täitsa meeldis
kuigi lõpp oli nõrk
cookie says:
Inga rääkis kuidas me kuid seda naerda röökisime?
INGEL says:
ta ütles, et ta oli purjus
cookie says:

oli
INGEL says:
ma lugesin selle viimase raamatu läbi ja seda filmi ma küll ootan
eriti tahan ma näha seda kohta, kus vampiir põlvitab hundi ees ja palub, et see ta naisele lapse teeks
cookie says:
voah
whät?!
INGEL says:
nojah, see oli kõva raamat. ma arvasin, et teised on sama rokkivad, aga siis ma lugesin oma arust seda esimest raamatut ja see oli küll igavene igav painfest. siis muidugi pärast tuli välja, et ma lugesin hoopis mingit midnight suni
a ma filmide põhjal pakun, et teised on mögamad
seal viimases oli veel hulgaliselt häid kohti. näiteks see, kuidas vampiir rebib hammastega lapse kõhust välja
ja siis hunt armub sellesse beebisse
ja seks oli ka muidugi hea: naine oli pärast liigestest väljas ja sinine
krt, selle kõrval on see vampire diaries ikka lahja
cookie says:

inglise keeles lugesid?
INGEL says:
kuigi, siin käib koguaeg vereimemine

*
teenage tough says:
hõi
ma helistasin eile
tahtsin sulle soovituse pärast peksa anda
Ingel says:
haaa, ma näen, et sa oled vampire diariest vaadanud
teenage tough says:
kust tead?
Ingel says:
no ma oleks ka tahtnud kellelegi peksa anda kui ma olin vaadanud umbes neli osa, aga siis ma siftisin oma mindi ja oli täitsa fun
teenage tough says:
ma vaatasin kõik osad ära
Ingel says:
no sel nädalal algab teine hooaeg
teenage tough says:
ma tean
ja lie to me pole veel uuesti alanud
ja supernatural
ja true blood

aga see paha poiss päevikutes
äge, selline
see peakarakter oli ikka nii piinatud, nii piinatud
st see mees
aga naine ka
aga et kaks venda kepiks vabatahtlikult sama naist ja veel koos tema nimel tegutseks.. selle twisti peale poleks ma ka suitsetades peale tulnud
Ingel says:
no loe breaking dawni
a see vanem vend võitis just mingi tähtsa konkursi, kus ta kuulutati parimaks sexy beastiks
samas
teisele kohale tuli edward cullen
ja sel pole ju seksiga midagi pistmist
nii et ma arvan, et see vähendab võidu suurust
tüdruk on mu maitse jaoks ka natuke liiga nunnu
vene ilu
bulgaarlane
teenage tough says:
nojah
ja kui ma esimest osa teist korda vaatasin, siis vaatasin et KURVA inimese rolli puhul olid tal silmad jube säravad
Ingel says:
nojah, PIIN on SÜGAVAL
peidus
a true bloodi teist hooaega hakkasin vaatama ja läheb järjest paremaks
nagu twin peaks
a seal vampire diaries on paar täiesti nõtra liini. see elena vend on liiga melodramaatiline ja see krdi nõiavanaema käib mulle täiega ajudele, alati kerin edasi
mingi krdi teema on neil selle nõia soenguga ka, igakord on uus sonks pähe tehtud, vahel jubedam kui eelmine ja ühes osas, kus ta kurvalt elena ukse taga seisis oli talle lõigatud mingi viltune tukk, mis neegri juustesse ei sobi ja siis oli selline tunne nagu oleks teda sealsamas võtteplatsil natuke tuustitud
ahjah, ja true bloodis häirib mind see, et sisse toodi vaprate ja ilusate bridget forrester. very disturbing
no krt, ütle mulle, et see bridget lüüakse varsti maha
teenage tough says:
see tiiner ajas mind ka närvi
et tema piin on NII suur
truu bladis ma pole veel seda forresteri näind, hm
mingi eriti uued osas?
osad
ma viimati vaatasin/tõmbasin miski juuni alguses?
ja sonksi osas olen ka nõus
kas panid tähele et see viltune sonks pani tema viltuse molli veel rohkem viltu?
aa, ja siis narkar kes lõpuks tapeti oli ka annoying
kuigi ma alguses vaatasin et sümpaatne
Ingel says:
kle, see forrester on teise hooaja alguses
see kits
aaa, narkar ei meeldinud. liiga pikad hambad
teenage tough says:
LOL
Ingel says:
ja see, kuidas ta seal ringi kargas pärast surma. dont like it
teenage tough says:
no mulle meeldis esimeses osas
vaatasin et ilusad juuksed
Ingel says:
aaa, ma ei näinud, hambad olid ees

like my mother says

bargain cat says:
talked to sis
well, she called to complain about a mutual friend
and said: fuck this shit, like my mother says
i said, interesting! my mother says the same thing!
daniel says:
haha
good finking

alati ja alasti

K says:
ja räägiks ka sellest, milla me lahkumispeo teeme
teed suure kräu või teeks musketäridega?
meanie queenie says:
A. lahkub eestist 24.09
K says:
no see on ju üsna varsti!
meanie queenie says:
ma ei tea kas ma kräud just tahan
K says:
aga väike vein ja kallistada tahaks ikka
meanie queenie says:
ma ei taha orgunni ja korraldamise stressi
K says:
aga me orgunnime ise
meanie queenie says:
jah, seda võtan alasti vastu
K says:
võime ka kuskile väljas üldse kohtuda
alasti?
meanie queenie says:
LOL
alati
K says:
eheh
alasti oleks ka põnev olnud

later I'll laugh at this

Joe says:
is Rajamägi an estonian surname?
muistse vikingi unistus says:
yeah
Joe says:
nasty..... i posted an advert looking for builders to install my new kitchen. and he was one of the respondents...
muistse vikingi unistus says:
most builders in finland are estonians
Joe says:
i think you'll find most are Finns
muistse vikingi unistus says:
large proportion of estonian construction people are in finland
Joe says:
not sure if i trust Estonian workers to install a whole kitchen.... it's a bit more complex than paiting a wall....
muistse vikingi unistus says:
working during the week, home for weekends
hm
estonians are like finns, just quicker and more skilled
Joe says:
aaah i thought so... that's why Estonia is such a rich and prosperous nation...
muistse vikingi unistus says:
well finns were not living under soviet rule
and you are being offensive
Joe says:
no more than usual...
muistse vikingi unistus says:
yeah you are
you can ridicule russians all you want
but i live amongst estonians and i don't want your prejudice casting a shadow on them
Joe says:
actually i can ridicule whomever i want!
muistse vikingi unistus says:
and don't consider yourself somehow superior
you probably can't do most of the things normal men do around here
Joe says:
like what?!
muistse vikingi unistus says:
estonians rarely require anyone to install their kitchen cabinets

M rocks

bedhead says:
I went to lunch with M
Oh, the soul rested
Ayomide Cracker says:
full stomach and a good mood?
bedhead says:
mhm
almost
he asked me about the assistant
I told him how she asked me one day
"do you by any chance have a book on crocheting at home?"
he knew precisely why I spat all over my monitor
he laughed as lengthily and as loudly all over the eating place

passions of twilight moms

Ayomide Cracker says:
ma räägin kõigile, et kui ma ükspäev enam tööle ei tule lambist, siis ma olen mehhikosse põgenenud või kuubale vm. aga siis mõtlesin, et kas selline rääkimine on hea idee - kui ma kuskil emajõe luhal laman alasti ja amneesias, et siis kõik rõõmustavad, et näe saigi oma elus vajaliku pöörde lõpuks tehtud
Inga says:
*naer
Froidi suss says:
(funny)
aga miks alasti ja amneesias?
Ayomide Cracker says:
allitereerus hästi *kulm
Inga says:
miks mitte
Ayomide Cracker says:
ma võin ka lihtsalt kõrkjates kolletuda
ah jaa muidugi, ma ju olen õudukaid näinud!
nii see tavaliselt algab. esimene kaader: jookseb umbmäärase vanusega naine paljajalu kooberdades, juuksed tuustis ja sorakil, sobbing jne
tuustis - see on muidugi mu igapäeva ideaal, mida katsun saavutada
Inga says:
aljona ei julge õudukaid vaadata
Froidi suss says:
ja, ja rinnad liiguvad kaadris ekstra aeglaselt?
Ayomide Cracker says:
võeh
Inga says:
ta käib kinos tvailaiti vaatamas
Ayomide Cracker says:
:D
Froidi suss says:
mis oli ka üsna hirmus kohati!
Inga says:
*hõõ
Ayomide Cracker says:
no siin ma ei saa naerda tegelt. ise käisin ka kinos esimest osa. aga ma ei teadnud!
Inga says:
krt rsk sa siis käisid või ei käinud?
mis sa tillitad? msnslap
Froidi suss says:
whät?! sul tvailait nähtud?
Inga says:
oled näinud?
Ayomide Cracker says:
*shame
Inga says:
läksid kinno ja tulid kohe tulema saalist?

Ayomide Cracker says:
nojah, esimest osa käisin kinos vaatamas ühe sõbraga. kutsus kaasa ja ma läksin paha aimamata
Inga says:
SIGA!
Ayomide Cracker says:
ei tulnud kohe tulema
Froidi suss says:
SIGA!
Ayomide Cracker says:
*hala
Inga says:
sul on esimene tvailat vaadatud!!!
ja sa ei öelnud meile!!!!
Froidi suss says:
ei võind varem rääkida???
Ayomide Cracker says:
shoot me in ze groin, then
aga ma rääkisin. aljontsik, otsi memost üles
Froidi suss says:
too much of a target! !04
Inga says:
we will *altkul
sa rääkisid
aga sa ütlesid et sa tulid ära
*altkul
Ayomide Cracker says:
see oli veel nii, et tibid olid saali ukse taga, most suspicios. kõik olid tatid, kõik nuuksusid saalis ja ahhetasid ja kihistasid. mina istusin
mmöh?
ei tulnud ära
Inga says:
*altkul
Froidi suss says:
mis tähendab, et sa TEGELIKULT said neist naljadest aru?!
Inga says:

Ayomide Cracker says:
ee kõik on mul sügaval alateadvuses
see
Froidi suss says:
meil on enamus asju naerdud, nüüd, eksole msnslap
Inga says:
lähme ära, aljona!

Inga has left the conversation.

tuju

Tera says:
meie rmtpidaja rääkis täna nõuka-aegse anekdoodi
on Laupäevak - kõik teevad tööd, ainult jänes ei tee midagi.
küsitakse - miks sa jänes tööd ei tee?
jänes vastab, et "u menja seksualnoje nastrojenije"
no aga mis see töötegemisse puutub?
a ja jebu vash subbotnik....
Froidi suss says:
:D
Tera says:
ja tead kui tihti mul on tööl seksualnoje nastrojenije....

M rocks

kahe koera pinged says:
oh well, I'll amuse you more
http://eatliver.com/i.php?n=5895
!M says:
whät?

kahe koera pinged says:
ikzäkli!
!M says:
and I sometimes think that my life is complicated and confusing
kahe koera pinged says:
no no, you can't possibly think that!
MY life is much more complicated
!M says:
well, considering that headline our lives are quite clear-cut, at least
kahe koera pinged says:
yeah, I don't have a sumo and you a snickers costume :(

thumbs

http://eatliver.com/i.php?n=5890

Wozza says:
my fingers might not be the longest in the world but at least they nice and wide
kahe koera pinged says:
but i admit i stared at my thumb too
i'd be well-endowed if i was a man
Wozza says:
lol
nice to know
kahe koera pinged says:
yeah, well not an elephant
but you know
nice
Wozza says:
uh huh - big enough for absolute pleasure but not too big to intimidate
kahe koera pinged says:
well, i still have nightmares of a porn clip my friend once sent me
dude was sooooooooooo long, i thought he'll come out of the chicks mouth
Wozza says:
hehehehe
kahe koera pinged says:
that's scary, not funny. I choke just thinking of it
Wozza says:
hey wait
u have a ruff idea of how big I am. Now I remember
not choke a girl big though
not going in from below
kahe koera pinged says:
oh stop it
Wozza says:
maybe in from the top
kahe koera pinged says:
oh, we argued if the erection was real or not
Wozza says:
uh huh
his was fake
looked like a sock roll
kahe koera pinged says:
lol
Wozza says:
unless he had the shorteest widest dick out
then I still feel sorry for him
kahe koera pinged says:
prolly the reason he wanted to get attention on the stage
Wozza says:
hehehehehe
the only attention I ever get when I have a hard on is from strippers
kahe koera pinged says:
haha
but i don't rule out I will be paying attention to thumbs when I'll go hunting
Wozza says:
lol - I'll make sure I walk around with my hands in my pockets from now on
keep them guessing

diabolic, hm?

arpasuyu says:
do you know what..
i'm pretty sure that you have a devil inside your body

and pepper wrote:

Hello my diabolic friend... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
How's life? Still making fun of everything and everyone? I do hope so. Don't ever change.


and my brother and my friends agree that I am truly evil... which makes me think I should really go to a church some time soon.

or not!

history to be preserved

Wikipedia article was changed, but one thing you should know:

Russian Massage
Russian Massage has three phases. The first phase is gentle, slow and mild. The second phase is hard, deep and fast. The third phase is similar to the first phase which is slow and gentle. The massage therapist applies honey.

tibinduse õudused

Inga says:
Minu meelest on see jube tahtis et naole paikest ei lase. Vaata naituseks Kaia Jappinneni pilti siit
http://2010.kroonika.ee/artiklid/42276/kaia_jappinen__votsin_tood_liiga_tosiselt_.html
Ilus naine ju iseenesest, aga nahk on yle moistuse paikese kaes ara korvetatud. Palju selliseid pruune tappe on jne. mis koik on suurest paevitamisest tekkinud.
Ayomide Cracker says:
not found. krt mul ei vea täna netiga
Ayomide Cracker says:
uu, tibijutt: ma käisin esimest korda solaariumis palju aega tagasi. kaua ei võtnud, aga kui välja tulin, siis terve nägu oli nagu sünnimärkidega kaetud. ma läksin nii kaameks, et värske õhetus kahvatas. et oli seda siis vaja. õnneks läks ära. ma nägin välja nagu lindsey lohan
kahe koera pinged says:
sama kulunud`?
Ayomide Cracker says:
brr. võeh
Inga says:
Milvike, sul on ikka vanusega mingi teema
kahe koera pinged says:
on. mul on nimelt viimane aasta 30neni
Ayomide Cracker says:
mulle lohani kohta hullult meeldib see klipp, mida raske leida oli. kuidas paris hilton karjub kuskil peol lahkuval lohanile: that firecrotch is not welcome!
kahe koera pinged says:
ja ma tunnen et peaks nagu suureks kasvama või midagi
Ayomide Cracker says:
ma arvan, et me ei kasva kunagi suureks
nagu pipi oma spungiga. ha
Inga says:
mina olen 44 ja ei tunne vapsee et ma peaks mingit vanusenalja koguaeg tegema
Ayomide Cracker says:
lasteraamatus otsitakse müstikat nimega spunk. täitsa lõpp
kahe koera pinged says:
mul on kriis
Inga says:
no sul on ikka mõni kriis käsil
kahe koera pinged says:
ma olengi kriisikolle *hala
Inga says:
ära hakka
mõtle mis see tibi pidi tegema kellele ämm külla tuli ja kes oma kreemid sinna tuppa unustas kus ämm magas ????
kahe koera pinged says:
sai 3 punni? *hala
Inga says:
JAH!!
ja punnidega võitlemiseks pidi TESTRIT kasutama mis HAISES
Ayomide Cracker says:
ma käisin laboris. terve aja naersin seda. mõtle mis ta tegema pidi
Inga says:
õnneks oli lool happy end
Ayomide Cracker says:
testerit. omg
Inga says:
no ma räägin!!
õudne!
kahe koera pinged says:
mina kasutan nivea palsami testrit
sest ma ei raatsi uut shampooni ja palsamit osta
shampooni on veel, aga palsami testreid rebisin ajakirjadest
a te muidugi ei tea et ma olen aastaid kasutanud tibipoe shampoone
ja näokreem oli mul 16 krooniga
Inga says:
mine perse, värdjas!
kahe koera pinged says:
ja Ingake ei lubanud mul endale uut ja head osta, ütles et siis londonisse ei lähe ja istun siin ilusa molliga
Inga says:
nojah, ma londonisse ei lähe ka
Inga says:
ja ma olen ju nii VANA (hei, Milvike)
no ei tea, terava keelega naine...
ja VANA (hei, Milvike)

Ayomide Cracker says:
ma siiani ei unusta oma kolleegi ütlust: mis sa sööd ka selle suuga, millega räägid või. ma olin neist just kellegi vittu saatnud

calling

sis: hey, whatcha doing?
A: watching really cool series. it's really interesting right now, talk later
sis: ok.

in 3 minutes phone calls again:
sis: and whatcha doing now?
A: aaaarghh!!!!
sis: mwahahaha!

why didn't I think of it before?

Quean says:
maybe i should get formal education in psychology
and treat people
just, well
differently
instill good ideas and whatnot
yeah, go burn your boss' house down, biatch deserves it
yes, yes you are small and pointless
give psycho-therapy a new ring

scares

Inga says:

http://ohtuleht.ee/index.aspx?id=378450
I wonder if Donatella Versace cries in front of the mirror?
how beautiful I am compared to her!
crystal.sparkles.angel says:
!rott
I nearly died from the scare
Inga says:
?
crystal.sparkles.angel says:
saw Donatella
of course you are
Inga says:
oh
yes
even you are!
crystal.sparkles.angel says:
LOL
Ingaa says:
for a second there, I was scared that you wouldn't understand

molli!

crystal.sparkles.angel says:
sain M-lt molli
täpselt nagu sinult trenni osas
Inga says:
1) kui on messengeri moll anna mulle ka
2) kui vaimne moll - mille eest
3) kui füüsiline moll, mine politseisse

what is your indian or arabic name?

F says:
better that than this shit
8 says:
yeah. of course I am a shit saver
non-existent saver, even
so a bit afraid
but every time I have to remind myself that I always land on my feet
F says:
that could be your indian or arabic name, for example
oh, my fabulous shit saver, who always lands on her feet
[oo, mu võrratu sitt säästja, kes alati maandub jalgadele]



*
To M - hey, what's your Indian name? Puppy Love? Theme song:
M: ..
A: but it's perfect! mwahaha, i will only turn to you like that from now on. how you like it, Puppy Love?
[endless laughter]
M: well, at least mine is not pointlessly long as yours
A: well, just remember the "võrratu" part
M: "just call me FAAAABULOUS"
A: yup, that's totally me!
*
A: don't you find it even a leeeeeeeeeeeetle bit offensive?
M: see, i care enough about you to let you know that i do not in the slightest.
A: bah, i feel like that lil dinosaur.

just do it

me: you going out? wait, i will go too! you can walk me to the bus station!
him: but that's in the opposite direction!
me: yeah, you can carry my bag too!
him: wow, the suggestion becomes more attractive by the minute!

i still laugh at this

why female spiders eat their mates after mating?
Big females eat their puny mates simply because a) they're hungry and b) they can.

The best reasons ever.

MJ also added c) why the fuck not.

llorona

SUPER says:
aga sellega seoses
tuletab mulle meeldi et suurimast pasast kasvab parim huumor
et nagu naerad sest ratsionaalne mõistus ei võta
Inga says:
indeed
SUPER says:
meie pole ju nutjad, eks &&
Inga says:
mina vihast nutan
SUPER says:
mina siis kui haletsen ennast
ja olen vihane et nii hale olen
Inga says:
LOL

words and tude

Island Living says:
so make a plan
SUPER says:
pfft
Island Living says:
:P
SUPER says:
remind me that i am fun and playful, not permanently pissed off malcontent
Island Living says:
you are?
i mean, you are
you're fun and playful, repeat after me
SUPER says:
i am fun and playful..
malcontent?
Island Living says:
playfully malcontent?
SUPER says:
oh that sounds fun
Island Living says:
go for it

liha-ha-ha

SUPER says:
Mall says:
ok
ja veel soovitus - mine poodi, osta Saaremaa Lihatööstuse ÜKSKÕIK milline toode, siis mine http://www.slt.ee/ , registreeri oma ostutšekk ja võid võita 2000-kroonise auhinna - sest keegi pole veel taibanud, et kampaania käib!
ja mine ka www.facebook.com/lihasober
ja võid veel liha ka võita

Darn Peckerwood says:
jussi õde võitis perenaise saiaga jura kohvimasina. ta on võitnud ka auto, spa-külastusi, hotelle, juuksenänni, raha, särki-värki
kui võtta, et sul keegi lähedaste hulgast midagi suurt võidab, et siis kui tõenäoline on, et sa ka miljoni saad. väike.
see õde võtab meie järgmistelt (olematutelt) lastelt ja lastelastelt ka võiduvõimalused ära
aga tänks vihje eest

Inga says:
Prunn is guuuuuuud! !hõõ

love is in the air

SUPER says:
hey dan
daniel says:
hey
SUPER says:
so what happened
daniel says:
i didn't fall in love
didn't seem right to continue
SUPER says:
woah
and you just woke up
and thought
that is it?
daniel says:
well, i thought about it, of course
SUPER says:
and
daniel says:
and i thought it's better to break it off
SUPER says:
how did she react
daniel says:
yeah, not that happy
she thought everything was fine and dandy
like a lightning from a clear sky, as we say in sweden
SUPER says:
you are such a heartbreaker
daniel says:
i am
i hate breaking up
SUPER says:
but you slide into ships so easily
daniel says:
perhaps
but no more
no more girls
no more breaking up
me and my fleshlight 4ever!
SUPER says:
oh yeah, you and your love of details
i want to fall in love
daniel says:
fuck love
it doesn't exist
SUPER says:
wow, you sound bitter
daniel says:
hehe
it's just annoying
i don't know if i was in love with christina
nor maria
which sucks a bit
SUPER says:
yeah, not quite fair
like test driving
and my, you come across as THE ultimate bf material
you asshole
daniel says:
haha
i know
SUPER says:
apparently i come across as the ultimate menhater
to all who have never been to my house
daniel says:
haha
SUPER says:
don't know which one is better
daniel says:
good question
i'm gonna go to asia and get myself a woman who doesn't speak swedish/english
my sex doll
perfect

SUPER says:
hahah. i need to train a teenager
for the same purpose
daniel says:
good idea
hm
a teenager who one can mold
form
teach
my disciple
SUPER says:
yeah. and they don't question you

but then, nah
daniel says:
no?
SUPER says:
i abhor puppy eyes
daniel says:
aww
it's cute
SUPER says:
pfft. nah, it is sticky
daniel says:
hehe
man hater!
SUPER says:
i like my men well pruned and with a good libido
but here, i point out, they should still have their own teeth
daniel says:
so around 55 and aging well?
SUPER says:
nah, i always liked them in their early forties
and you want a child?
daniel says:
a child? no no
no children here
i want to be free
SUPER says:
i mean
daniel says:
a young girl? yes please
at least to fuck for a bit
SUPER says:
here i have to be crude and quote my friend (i literally dropped my jaw): old enough to bleed, old enough to breed
daniel says:
when they're eight, it's too late
but it's a good quote
bleed
SUPER says:

child molester
daniel says:
no no
i LOVE children
SUPER says:
i take it, you don't go giving them christian side hugs, eh?
daniel says:
hehe
no
but i'd love to
!
SUPER says:
but hey
do you know your neighbours yet?
daniel says:
no?
SUPER says:
you should go try to make a good impression on them
then you can commit unutterable indecencies and they will all say in court that DANIEL IS SUCH A NICE MAN!
daniel says:
hehe
they are mostly ex-drunks and ooold people
its
it's in a semi poor area
SUPER says:
you should fit right it
good people wouldn't have you
i love bad reputation of my area
seeing whores, and drunks and bums and druggies makes me feel oddly normal
daniel says:
hehe
i kinda' enjoy it as well, as long as it doesn't affect me
although, having whores close by would be nice
the older i get, the more i am PRO buying sex
SUPER says:
i'm no amateur either

older i get, more i want GOOD sex
daniel says:
good sex? pfft, dreamer
SUPER says:
fuck off, bf material
i'm done test driving
daniel says:
true
SUPER says:
and i am sick of the 5 y ship, kinda. i go on it out of inertia, since i am too particular about chemistry
and with him, its easy.
cept for the fact we live very separate lives and its perfect, BUT
daniel says:
5 y ship?
SUPER says:
puffball - it's been 5 years
anyways, i cannot chain him and have him ANY time i want. fuckin negotiations about schedules
and
i always want more than i get
daniel says:
puffball? who?
SUPER says:
now. think back in time. me crying my heart out on your lap and you got aroused, you jerk
daniel says:
dude, that's YEARS ago
you know my memory sucks


SUPER says:
yeah, and it's still me and him
just without the dramas and stuff
daniel says:
that doesn't sound very healthy :-/
no drama is good though
SUPER says:
now its just comfortable and he knows me as well as i know him
daniel says:
so why no relationship?
SUPER says:
but you know
daniel says:
sorry if i should know :-/
SUPER says:
heh. because we are fit as friends
but besides love for reading, music and double entendre
nothing in common. nada. i would never bring him to my friends or family
and i would never want to know his friends. besides one.
biblically, you know
but even i am not such a bitch
daniel says:
wow
weird
SUPER says:
why
daniel says:
well, wanting to spend time with someone you wouldn't introduce to your friends/family
SUPER says:
it's perfect - but in a very isolated time and space
and family & friends - chosen ones
daniel says:
true, i guess
what about visiting the guy in .. zimbabwe?
SUPER says:
nah
daniel says:
didn't you have a man there?
SUPER says:
he got weird
so i thought
i should start going out more
daniel says:
heh
SUPER says:
he is moodier than me
daniel says:
men
eh
more alcoholics in estonia now?
thinking of the economy crashing
heard estonia got fucked pretty badly
SUPER says:
what you mean
daniel says:
economy fucked = less jobs = more alcoholics
(thought about going out, which means alcohol...)
SUPER says:
oh, so i thought you suggested there was more dating material for me
daniel says:
haha

excellent prospect

SUPER says:
Vote: http://www.ruukkihome.ee/renovation/contest/view/1df489e3ec2acda489e11df87ea3b6c286101310131/

Island Living says:
are you absolutely sure?

SUPER says:
si
Island Living says:
done
if i've just volunteered to sell my kidney i will have you assassinated

girl talk and sexy grammar

farrago:
bad grammar riles me up
Word Salad:
me too
i have bad grammar tourettes
i can't help but correct it
farrago:
i have to say some brits are BAD
there was this guy who seemed okay at first
decent enough to fuck, i wasn't really expecting much mental stimulation
but oh my god
when he started sending me texts, i seriously thought he had dyslexia or some mental problem
Word Salad:
hahahahahahahaha
farrago:
so i was unusually patient while decyphering
Word Salad ütleb:
haha i am lolling
farrago:
but then i asked up front
he said he had no prob at all
he just didn't study enough to spell
let me tell you, his impressive equipment lost all value in a second
Word Salad:
hahaha
i can imagine
i cannot stand text talk
it's like USE PREDICTIVE MOTHERFUCKER
it's 2010
we don't need to shorten things
we have technology allowing us to wax poetic
and unlimited texts in most cases
farrago:
so now meeting people who write you first seems the only reasonable way
Word Salad:
ha
there is a serious shortage of men over here
it's ridiculous

grr

dynamic thinker says:
as soon as someone sets on the path of recreation
they get obsessed with roots
Island Living says:
is this about dying your hair?
dynamic thinker says:
'what you mean
Island Living says:
recreation involved changing hair colour, and obviously having your roots recoloured would be part of this
simple
dynamic thinker says:
i was being more abstract
children
future
past
Island Living says:
future past children is pretty abstract
rhubarb
onion
flying pig
i can be abstract too

at work

A: ah, so I took a look at that data..
M: could you, perhaps look at that other thing too.
A: [smugly] already did, hah.
M: [sarcastically] you are so clever!
A: nah. I just know how your simple mind works.
M: ..
A: haha. 1:0
M: okay, sun is shining and you are in a good mood today, so I will let it be.

after lunch

A: you know what I just did?
M: surprise me.
A: I forgot a chewing gum in my hair. I took it out of my mouth, thinking I should throw it out, but forgot it between my fingers and probably scratched my head, because the next time I did it, I found this shit stuck in my hair. had to cut it out.
M: you score in your own goal. 1:1.

baseball bat and batshits

me mõlemad M-ga vihastasime oma lätaka peale. ta pidavat homme tulema. ma ütlesin, et too pesapallikurikas alt autost ära, paneme ta lihtsalt nurka seisma. M ütles, et ei hakka tassimisega vaeva nägema. niikuinii löön jalaga.

beware the wolf, little lady

http://www.pitt.edu/~dash/type0333.html

"Moral: Children, especially attractive, well bred young ladies, should never talk to strangers, for if they should do so, they may well provide dinner for a wolf. I say "wolf," but there are various kinds of wolves. There are also those who are charming, quiet, polite, unassuming, complacent, and sweet, who pursue young women at home and in the streets. And unfortunately, it is these gentle wolves who are the most dangerous ones of all."

indeed

You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.

at work

A: [talks, wants reaction]
M: [raises head, looking perplexed]do you see any spark in my eyes that signals you of any interest on my part?
A: [shrugs] nope, your eyes look just as blank as usual
M: [after regaining his composure] you suck!
A: [does a dance of victory]


A: if there is anything I say or do to offend you..
M: ah, do not worry...
A: then never doubt, it was always my intention.


M: [mentions he wants me to show him how some programs work and before going out to smoke] And now I go out. I come back, and then you show me.
A: [grabs chest and feigns shocked innocence]
M: [blushes and leaves]

A: [after finishing an important project for M, and upon rather serious concentration stating blankly] and you, of course, didn't make any coffee.
M: [gets up energetically and heads for the kitchen. after a few moments returns, rather puzzled] wait, I wasn't supposed to make coffee. You said it like you repeated that for about 4 times by now.
A: [grinning] I know I didn't.

A: [doing analysis, concentrated]
M: [talks, wants reaction]
A: ah./oh./uh huh
M: BUT YOU DON'T CARE! (A's favourite cry for attention)
A: uh huh.
M: bahaha! I just proved that I am like you! And you are like me! You see the other one being busy and deep in thought, but you still keep on talking and demand reaction, and if you don't, you cry "but you don't care!". And when I bug you I see that you don't pay me much attention and reply in monosyllables. Just like me! FACT!
A: uh huh.

A: [thinking if should listen to music through headphones or speakers] are you busy? You want to concentrate?
M: I don't mind, you might as well keep on talking, I am not paying attention...
A: YOU SUCK!
M: [smug]


M: as an excellent sales person I am trained to make you feel important by leaving you the illusion that I am listening to everything you say. feeling listened to does wonders to people's egos and makes them easier targets for manipulation.
A: as an excellent manipulator I am trained to make you feel as a smart and great sales person by letting you believe your petty attempts at world domination are working. hiding the fact that I am aware of your fruitless games, I keep your ego afloat, and bad sales people need their egos big.

Miss Talkalot

setting: Sunday, festive table, sauna prepared, siblings meet at big sister's big house.
players: sis (Nasha), her hubs (Kalamari), bro (Ljoshenka Horoshenkij), his wife (Miss Salsa), Niece 1 (serious-opponent-in-board-games aka Lo), Niece 2 (NONPAREIL Princess aka Li), yours truly.


scene one: the kitchen
moi: so I was just meeting my best bud J and he was introducing me to his boyfriend. at the end when we part, I hug the guy and say I am very sorry I talked you to death! sometimes I cannot help it! and he says he was warned before, so I turn to J and demand to know what was he saying. J blankly states: dominant independent character. Talks a lot.
sis: Talkalot? hm?
moi: TALKS. A LOT.
sis: ah, you got me confused and I already started thinking about Lancelot
moi: well now that you mention it, moi and Laima usued to talk about wanting to date Mr Fuckalot.
sis: :O! :D

scene two: behind the table (best bits) (kids playing behind the computer in another room)
moi to Salsa: ah, and to make the update complete, did I ever mention how we got lice this summer?
sis: "now there are more of us/meid on nüüd mitu"
S: what?!
moi: yeah. Well, in the end we laughed about it. our main joke "there are more of us now" it was me finding solace in humour and telling my friend Inga about this horror. So you know how lots of morons have all their life on display in msn? and if they get fresh kids, they update on nearly every minute of their bastards? most usual is that when a new one is born this line is used? so Inga suggested I use it and when someone would congratulate me on babies, I retort with "I got lice, you idiot". but Nasha and me been laughing about this alone - since this shit isolates you completely! nobody you can tell!
sis: yes, you have no idea how far I tryed to keep my head away from people. people at my new job thought I was weird, moving around with such body language.
S: how awful! how? you got them from kids?
sis: yeah.. [tells story how we found them at kids' heads while in the country and how till the last moment we hoped we didn't have them, and how we found we were wrong]
S:[tells the story about her lice in the past]
moi: yeah, so i worked from home and couldn't work at all that day. hands shaking, i was doing frantic research on the internet, going through anything related to lice.
sis: yes, 2 hours after we part in the morning, she calls me and I sit in my pretty business costume, surrounded by people, find out that the treatment is not just that easy, but you have to repeat it in 10 days, can only say yes or no, and shivers down my spine, praying nobody can hear my sister's voice from the phone and god forbid understand what we talk about.
sis: it was also funny how we went to the farthest pharmacy on our way home, in area we never shop or do anything, as far from town as possible, that god forbid somebody doesn't recognise us!
moi: and in the pharmacy, i specifically point out the name of the name of the medicine...
sis: and the woman shouts back: YOU MEAN THAT MEDICINE AGAINST LICE?
moi: and blushing and saying rather neurotically I whisper - yes yes, its for somebody I know...
sis: you should have seen how the people in the pharmacy reacted! caution!
moi: cherry on top, 2 days after treatment, my client wants me to do some market research for ....
THEIR LICE TREATMENT!!
sis: ha, and then she gets complimented on excellent analysis!
moi: yes, and a bit after that they ask me to do the same stuff for baby oil!
S: baby oil!
moi: I know. I have to say I wasn't as inspired.
**

Ljosha(d): Fuck it, I am going to sauna, women have gone mad (after me and sis telling his wife about that an incident that involved some lewd gesticularion)


**

Ljosha: I spend hours in sauna, and I come back and everything is the same: A is still talking! Real Miss Talkalot!

***

sis: ooh, that story I must have told everyone now. so I go to Riga to a business meeting, and my colleague tells me of his side business at raising sheep. so after some time I ask absent-mindedly if he ever tried goats. Then he turns to me, looks me deeply in the eyes and says very seriously: Dear N, there are many things I have never tried in my life. Goats I haven't tried.
moi: yes, and now imagine her in her business suit! :D

**



scene three: behind TV and at the door (kids playing behind the computer in another room)
sis painting nails and retells Salsa her favourite joke: woman is almost completely defenceless/vulnerable while her painted nails are drying.
Kalm: woman, I will see you upstairs in 3.
*
a line in the movie, in a scene where a guys tries to hitchike and stops a posh Mercedes convertible, and the blond chick behind the wheel says: Dude, you don't know how many kilometres of cock I had to suck to get this car.

we all burst out out laughing at Nasha's dropped jaw..
moi: hey Kalm, what was the last car you bought Nasha?
Kalm: big
sis: bitch
*


at the door, Nasha the designated driver, stands with hands up in the air and calls for her husband and asks him to put her coat on.
Kalm messing with the coat: damn it, wrong hole!
Kalm muttering: damn you woman, you should be upstairs, I have only 3 minutes left.
moi: whät?
Kalm: well my wife wanted a Mercedes.
moi: ah, and since she paints her nails on Sunday evenings, we ruined your best day of the week?
Kalm: exactly.

death to orkut!

MP: Number of users on Facebook in Estonia: 151 320 Number of male users on Facebook in Estonia: 64 740 Number of female users on Facebook in Estonia: 86 580 Penetration in Estonia: 11.65 %



Facebook Statistics – By country Facebakers.com
www.facebakers.com
Facebook statistics from different countries of the world based on the advertising tool.


Victor: it's all about penetration for you, isn't it?

MP: no Victor, the male-female ratio is also important :-]

what would your brother give you and your sister as a present?

in 2001 we got identical T-shirts from him, that had huge writing:

If you think that I am a BITCH, YOU SHOULD MEET MY SISTER!!

[she didn't like it, probably because I wore it to all family occasions]
[brother in law never recovered from the concequences of his laughter]
[she would probably wear it to family occasions today]

Big 5

MJ: High neuroticism & openness. Low conscientiousness, agreeableness & extroversion. Yep, I'm a adventurous wanker, it's official.

BBC - Lab UK - Experiments - The Big Personality Test
www.bbc.co.uk
The BBC's Child of Our Time is carrying out a groundbreaking scientific study to discover how important our personalities are in shaping the direction of our lives. Do our personalities shape our lives or do our lives shape our personalities?


AK: I'm high on openness and extroversion, very low on neuroticism and agreeableness. Not to mention conscientiousness. It says that my life goal is hedonism. So I'm an arrogant self-indulger with a shitty attitude.

MJ: We were made for each other. Let's wed at once.

AK: yes, wreak ineffable havoc and spend extensive time in correctional facilities?

MJ: Nah. Doin' time ain't my bag, sistah. Once we've fucked everything up let's drive off a big cliff, try take out a few cops on the way. You dig?

AK: where have you been most of my life?!

vive la revolution

MJ: Please copy and paste this to your status if you know someone, or have been affected by someone, who needs a punch in the face. People who need a punch in the face affect the lives of many. There is still no known cure for someone who deserves a punch in the face, except a punch in the face, but we can raise awareness of this tragic affliction.

AK: everyone should just go around punching everyone as a pre-emptive measure.


MJ: hahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i actually did Laugh Out Loud

AK: I was being completely serious.

AK: I know you were, and I'm all for it. viva la punchy revolution

family business

Nieces: Hey A, why aren't you married?
Moi: Well, have you noticed how little time your uncle started spending with you ever since he got married?
Nieces: You are right, you shouldn't be married.

astume liikmeks

Inga:
CV keskus saatis : Virtuaalne värbajate klubi
mina loen: Virtuaalne värdjate klubi

ära löö!

Mark: kapsa hakkliha hautisest: sinna EI ole vaja sisse panna puljongikuubikut. believe me. just järgi proovitud. toidublogidest ja muudest iga-loll-võib-sõna-võtta kohtadest: prooviks ikkagi jääda selle juurde, et räägib see, kes teab, millest ta räägib. kaks õppetundi ühe õhtu jooksul. kohe palju targem tunne on.

Alice: kui loll peab olema, et vahe nii märgatav on?

Mark: you tell me.

Alice: ma ei saa. ma kardan, et sa lööd mind. JÄLLE!

musical

MJ: has piano hands, not guitar fingers.
AK: and drum of an ass?
MJ: ha I wish it was that tight

going for indian

Arty Morty says:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks2Xv5OvJ3Q
i am still at work
going for indian later on
heratyck says:
lol
Arty Morty says:
what
heratyck says:
I had this visual of you stalking an indian (as in native american)
Arty Morty says:
its like in mr and mrs smith
how was your day?
i got Lucky.

pearl of the day

D K:The people of Bournemouth will be right pissed off when they wake up on May 10 and they are staring at the North Sea, freezing their tatties off of the nearest bit of vitamin C is 270 miles away....

BBC News - David Cameron tells Tories he can turn Britain around
news.bbc.co.uk
Conservative leader David Cameron has said he has "got what it takes to turn this country around", in his party's final get-together before the election.

hea isu

oi, praegu sai nalja. tulid postimees.ee-st kaks inimest, üks kommenteeris mu tassi ja ma ütlesin et jah, hea suur. siis kommenteeris, et et oi, siis oled suure kohviisuga. ma ütlesin et jaa, ma olen üldse hea isuga!
no ja siis on järsku vaikus

aging extrovert says:
kui nad lahkusid, M oli kägaras, et krt see piinlik vaikus oleks võind veel 4 sekki pikem olla, siis oleks tipptase!
Inga says:
!hõõ
siis tegid jalaga kiirelt tümp-tüpm-tümp ja kihistasid psühhootiliselt?
raging extrovert says:
jah!
!hõõ

*M pärast ütles, et oleks pidanud mulle küpsiseid pakkuma
*ma tõsiselt ootasin, et vastuseks saan: "no eks sinust paistab ka!"

vot tak!

- Простите, пожалуйста - вы мисс или миссис?
- Какая, нахуй, мисс! Не видишь - леди!!!

priidu-leena

Inga says:
http://www.elu24.ee/?id=216041
Miss Frantic says:

INga says:
teine eesti!
Miss Frantic says:
täiega
mul on tänane päev kuidagi sinine
Inga says:
vähemalt ei ole sa intsu-anna
Miss Frantic says:
!naer
!wet
Inga says:
&&
Priidu-Leena says:
vaata nime !hõõ
Inga says:
!hõõ
Priidu-Leena says:
!hi5
Inga says:
!hi5

magamisest

Inga says:
ma olen delikät flauä
last minute hopper says:
oled
http://www.elu24.ee/?id=216534
ja mina olen naahui leedi!
Inga says:
tänu naiste pidevalt hõivatud ajule !04
last minute hopper says:
no just
Teadlased on ka tähele pannud, et ühes voodis magavatest inimestest kipub sagedamini ärkama see, kes on kehalt ja kaalult kergem
vaene tinka !there

Inga says:
!altkulm
minu mees peaks siis olema max 49 kilone
briti teadlased on ikka lambad
last minute hopper says:
!hõõ
Inga says:
loomulikult ärkab kergem kui raskem külge keerab siis väiksem hüpleb voodis ju
sina seda muidugi ei tea !there
Lil' Gameaholic Cracker says:
:D te olete priceless